Kept

kept


i am kept in a quiet place
so the anguish does not show
i am kept in a guarded place
where my shouts cannot be heard
i am kept in a darkened place
alone, my misery is content to grow
but inside me is a hell-torn place
where all i know and feel is hurt


20/02/01

Linger

Linger


The kiss that lingers
Is the kiss-off
You get when love
Wipes it's hands of you.
Of all the things in life I've seen
This is what I remember
The most.
It's the most vivid memory my heart will ever find.



02/01/01

Pump

Pump


surveying the splendor
of living the legend
bringing a rent
to the edge of divine,
knowledge of portent
grasping wax handholds
total surrender
of what seems so fine.
caulking in between the stages
learning life's lessons, earning your wages
ruptured enmity of careless outrages
heart-killing surges of nothing but
vaccuous
spectral
pulse.



19/03/99

Tarnish

Tarnish


There's a little copper
In my ring of gold,
A little vagueness
In the songs of old,
There's melancholy
In tales that are told,
And I lay my glasses on the table
My vision blured and sight unstable
I've been shoveling crap out of the gods' stables
And I think it's time to fold my tent
Look for jobs on a new continent
I feel all uneasy where once I was content,
In hindsight my heartache has been foretold both up and down
But I stand in the stable and check my ring again, and frown.


25/01/01

Taste Buds (The Radish Poem)

Taste Buds (The Radish Poem)


garnish my soul
with a little bit of heart
garnish my words
with tasteful art
garnish my religion
with a whole lot of love
and garnish my friends
with me
and garnish my friends
with me.


20/03/99

If

If


If I said you had a lovely heart
(You can see in my eyes that it=s true)
Would you hold it against me,
My future coming wife? (Wherever you are)

Jan 28/03

Elusion

Elusion


The truth is hard to find
Hands outstretched, walking blind
Circling myself like a bird of prey
Stumbling through the black of another’s day
Silhouette my soul, pirouette my reason
Insanity of faith, the ultimate treason
I lead the pack when I’m furthest behind
Like day-old pastries, we’re out of season
Acrimony besets with strife
Truth holds your double-edged knife
Tearing halves of self apart
Follow the chaste, find a tart
Try to run with ankles chained
Blackness leaves a teary stain
Find ironic hardness to life
Spinal cord snapped, symbiotic brain
No way to win, nowhere to start
Can’t get the needle to my heart
Hands outstretched, walking blind
The truth is truth eludes mankind


Dec 10/2001

Dark Place

Dark Place


I am a dark place
where God is my light?
no gleaming brilliance lights my feet
and punishment from all I take
missing one-third of my destiny's call
in a dark place my own I fall.
In a dark place where I am small
dwell the memories that are my tormented hell
once I thought my life was going so well
now, in dark places i dwell,
now in dark places
I construct my mirror image
drawing a breath to scream my escape
but is it too late?
where is my light, O God, where is light?
in this darkness so fell my own
the darkness my church my home.


-Apr 19/01

ABL

ABL


Grey shadow covered
Weeping on the sand
Overcast above
And a seashell in my hand
Stained the face the hands
Gritty seconds tick off my life
Surviving through death-dealing waves on
The abandoned beach of life.
I've been there
I've seen there
I've sat there
I've weeped there
I've laid down cold and helpless
Woke up and felt the heat
Searing through the rags
That were left me by the sea.
I know.


May 3/01

B.M.O.T.P.A.

B.M.O.T.P.A.


My black mistress calls me
and answer I must
I feel fear, and disgust
and stomach-churning lust.
My black mistress beckons
with an aged sepulchre hand
And I vow to speak naught but truth
as open-mouthed I take the stand.
My mistress perjures herself with the blood of the saint,
She uses my hands to spread her poison-doctrine,
'Til even the minds of the mighty cringe and grow faint.
My black mistress calls me
and answer I must
I feel fear, and disgust
and stomach-churning lust.
My black mistress summons
and commanded is my will
My hands rests on the parchment
as her words through me spill.
I sit on the edge of the world and howl
She holds the aces whilst I play the tart,
At her command I go, laugh, die, or scowl,
My black mistress of the poetic arts.



November 4th 1999